“Hello!”

No, delete. Too eager.

“Hello”

No, delete. Sounds formal

“Hey!”

No, delete. What kind of conversation starter is that.

“Hey, how’s it going?”

Ugh, like you don’t say that literally every day.

“Man, work today sucks! Hbu?”

No, god why do you have to make it all about you all the time?

“What are you up to?

You sound so desperate, this is why no one likes you.

“I’m so bored”

Cause you’re boring, what the hell are they going to say to that? Useless

“Feel like talking?”

So dramatic. God you’re so needy. Why don’t you just leave them alone.

“Hey, do you actually like me?”

What the fuck are you even doing

“I want to reach out and I don’t know how.”

No.

“….”

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